Psychologist – Populer Psikoloji http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/ Tue, 22 Nov 2022 07:19:42 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=5.9.3 http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/07/icon-2021-07-01T204530.168-150x150.png Psychologist – Populer Psikoloji http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/ 32 32 Psychologist offers advice to protect mental health as Greater Victoria grapples with labor shortages http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/psychologist-offers-advice-to-protect-mental-health-as-greater-victoria-grapples-with-labor-shortages/ Tue, 22 Nov 2022 01:31:00 +0000 http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/psychologist-offers-advice-to-protect-mental-health-as-greater-victoria-grapples-with-labor-shortages/ It’s no secret that there is a labor shortage in the country and this puts pressure on local business owners and staff trying to keep their businesses afloat. Chris Jones is the owner of Jones Bar-B-Que in Langford, BC. On Monday he was back at work. “I wasn’t supposed to work today, I wasn’t supposed […]]]>

It’s no secret that there is a labor shortage in the country and this puts pressure on local business owners and staff trying to keep their businesses afloat.

Chris Jones is the owner of Jones Bar-B-Que in Langford, BC. On Monday he was back at work.

“I wasn’t supposed to work today, I wasn’t supposed to work yesterday,” Jones said.

Already short on entry staff, two people were taken ill and another quit via text message this week.

“We spend thousands of dollars on Indeed every month trying to recruit people,” Jones said.

“SYSTEM WORK PROBLEM”

It’s not just the restaurant owner who takes over.

“I ended up doing a 6 a.m. at 8 p.m. [shift]“said Tanja Lindquist, head chef at Jones Bar-B-Que.

“My sous chef came over and did a closing for me, so I wasn’t there until midnight,” Lindquist said.

It’s tough on everyone, and the hospitality industry isn’t alone in facing a labor shortage.

“There is a systemic labor problem in Canada,” said Dr. Mark Colgate, a professor at the University of Victoria’s Gustavson School of Business.

Colgate says that due to Canada’s changing demographics, the labor shortage isn’t likely to improve any time soon.

“This was predicted long before the pandemic hit,” Colgate said. “We have more people retiring than we have coming into the market, it’s as simple as that.”

Colgate says the remaining employees to maintain the fort are going to have to work harder than before.

“It’s just the reality of a recession,” he said.

MENTAL HEALTH AND WORKPLACE TIPS

The increase in workload, combined with a decrease in work-life balance, has a negative effect on people’s mental health.

“I think the seriousness of the situation is getting worse,” said Dr. David Mensink, a licensed psychologist at the College of Psychologists of British Columbia.

Mensink says work-related mental health issues aren’t new, but the severity of these issues appears to have increased in recent years.

He has some tips to help employers create a healthy workplace during difficult times.

He suggests allowing staff to be involved in decisions made about their work. This shows staff members that they are valued as employees.

Mensink says communicating possible career development opportunities can also be a source of motivation for staff, especially if the extra effort one day results in a promotion or higher salary.

Just saying thank you for a job well done can also go a long way, he says.

For employees, depression and anxiety often present themselves when the work gets too heavy. If so, Mensink suggests talking with your supervisor and trying to make changes in the workplace with tangible ideas.

Workers are also encouraged to find experiences in their private lives that make them happy and to try to forget about work when they are away.

Talk to a loved one or close friend about your situation. Often, getting it off your chest will go a long way, the psychologist says.

“These seem to be the ones that stand out, go a long way in helping people function well at work,” Mensink said.

If that doesn’t work, it might be time to explore other employment options.

It is estimated that we spend a third of our life at work. Mensink says it’s important to make sure the remaining two-thirds aren’t negatively affected by your work.

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A Psychologist Explains Why Some People Can’t Stop Chasing Toxic Relationships http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/a-psychologist-explains-why-some-people-cant-stop-chasing-toxic-relationships/ Sat, 19 Nov 2022 16:22:06 +0000 http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/a-psychologist-explains-why-some-people-cant-stop-chasing-toxic-relationships/ Why do we keep dating people who are bad for us? Getty Many people come to therapy wondering if they have trouble choosing romantic partners. They ask questions like: “I think ‘toxic’ has become my type. It’s so frustrating. Why don’t I find healthy people exciting anymore?” “My recurring partner can sometimes be violent. I […]]]>

Many people come to therapy wondering if they have trouble choosing romantic partners. They ask questions like:

  • “I think ‘toxic’ has become my type. It’s so frustrating. Why don’t I find healthy people exciting anymore?”
  • “My recurring partner can sometimes be violent. I walk on eggshells even when we’re not fighting. I know I should leave for good, but I can’t bring myself to. Why am I stuck in this cycle? »
  • “I recently met someone who makes me feel like a whole different person. I love being with them and I don’t want to miss us being a thing. But I’m also on the fence because I have a mutual friend who warned me about his past How do I know if they are bad for me?

A toxic relationship is one that is characterized by a lack of trust, respect, and healthy communication. These relationships can be detrimental to our mental and physical health, yet some people find themselves repeatedly drawn to toxic partners.

If this is you, it might be time to take a step back and examine why this pattern exists in your life. It’s the first step to breaking a cycle that can lead you down a lonely and self-destructive path.

Here are three reasons why you might be attracted, time and time again, to people who don’t have your best interests at heart.

#1. Is your love pathological?

The desire for love is rooted in every human being. It is the foundation upon which healthy romantic relationships flourish.

But some people may have an obsessive and pathological need for love that could cause problems in their relationships with romantic partners and dating in general.

A study found that pathological love, which is a behavioral addiction in which one person offers repetitive and compulsive care and attention to another, is linked to impulsivity.

Because these people only feel whole when they have someone to love and care for, they often impulsively begin romantic relationships without considering whether they are compatible with their partner. According to the study, these people are also more likely to stay in (rather than end) an unhealthy relationship despite knowing they’re unhappy.

#2. Is your attachment style to blame?

A study published in the Journal of social and personal relationships found that if you saw your parents argue often when you were a child, it could affect your attitude towards romantic relationships as an adult.

The study found that children who grew up in conflict-ridden homes developed what psychologists call “insecure attachment styles.’ These types of attachment styles make it difficult for people to connect with others in meaningful and fulfilling ways.

The two insecure attachment styles that the study linked to arguments between parents were:

  • Anxious attachment stylewhere you are constantly afraid of being left behind or abandoned
  • Avoidant attachment stylewhere you suppress your true emotions for fear of appearing weak or expressing your vulnerability

These suboptimal attachment styles can make it easy for someone to get involved with someone who has toxic traits. For example, if you have an anxious attachment style, you might confuse a partner’s controlling behavior with being “caring.” Even realizing there is a problem, you may not be able to face them because you are afraid of being abandoned.

#3. Do you have borderline tendencies?

If your relationship history is extremely toxic, you may need to take a long, hard look at yourself in the mirror.

People with borderline personality disorder (BPD) are prone to engaging in unstable and risky romantic activities. If you have borderline personality disorder, your relationships may alternate between two phases:

  • Idealizationwhen you think your partner is “perfectly perfect”
  • Devaluationwhen you think your partner is “perfectly imperfect”

This is called splitting. It is an unconscious defense mechanism that helps people with borderline personality disorder protect their all-or-nothing attitude towards everything.

A study Posted in Personality and individual differences found that adolescents who reported feeling disgusted with themselves were at risk of developing borderline personality disorder (BPD) later in life. Other factors in adolescence that are associated with the development of borderline personality disorder include strong impulsiveness, uncontrolled anger, distrust of others’ motives, and emotional instability.

Some of the most common symptoms of borderline personality disorder are listed below. But, remember, don’t diagnose complex mental health issues yourself. If you suspect you have borderline tendencies, help is available.

  • Feeling of abandonment and hyper-reactivity to rejection
  • feelings of emptiness
  • A negative self-image often accompanied by harsh self-criticism
  • emotional instability
  • Impulsiveness
  • Risky behaviors including self-harm

Conclusion

Toxic patterns in your love life can be frustrating and painful, but there is hope. By becoming aware of the patterns in your relationships, building your self-esteem, and asking for help when needed, you can free yourself from the cycle of toxicity and create lasting, healthy, and fulfilling love.

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Psychologist accused Love is Blind contestant of ‘abusive’ behavior http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/psychologist-accused-love-is-blind-contestant-of-abusive-behavior/ Thu, 17 Nov 2022 10:18:22 +0000 http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/psychologist-accused-love-is-blind-contestant-of-abusive-behavior/ There will always be drama netflix dating show Love is blind – but a psychologist said a relationship on the show felt more like “violence” than love, calling out the show’s creators for allowing them to let one of the contestants go. Isabelle Morley, Psy.D wrote about the show on psychology today (opens in a […]]]>

There will always be drama netflix dating show Love is blind – but a psychologist said a relationship on the show felt more like “violence” than love, calling out the show’s creators for allowing them to let one of the contestants go.

Isabelle Morley, Psy.D wrote about the show on psychology today (opens in a new tab)calling the article ‘The unpardonable error in the Meeting “Love is blind”‘.

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Valley School Psychologist Wins Statewide Honor | News, Sports, Jobs http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/valley-school-psychologist-wins-statewide-honor-news-sports-jobs/ Mon, 14 Nov 2022 06:11:15 +0000 http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/valley-school-psychologist-wins-statewide-honor-news-sports-jobs/ NILES — Alanna Bebech, a school psychologist with the Trumbull County Educational Services Center, has been recognized as the recipient of the 2022 Early Career Award from the Ohio School Psychologist Association (OSPA). This honor is intended to recognize the achievements of school psychologists during the first five years of their career. According […]]]>

NILES — Alanna Bebech, a school psychologist with the Trumbull County Educational Services Center, has been recognized as the recipient of the 2022 Early Career Award from the Ohio School Psychologist Association (OSPA).

This honor is intended to recognize the achievements of school psychologists during the first five years of their career. According to OSPA, the recipient agrees to promote school psychology, research and advocacy. Bebech received the award Thursday at OSPA’s fall conference in Columbus.

“School Psychologist is one of my favorite titles that I hold,” Bebech said. “Every day I am able to see growth and change in students and staff; few other jobs allow it. Being recognized by my colleagues and my organization makes me want to dive deeper and keep finding new and different ways to serve our Trumbull County students to make sure they all shine.

After watching her mother work in student services for many years in different roles, Bebech learned that people learn and see things differently at a very young age.

“I wanted to find out why and find different options to better meet the needs of students, which led me directly to school psychology. I thrive on human interaction and opportunities to connect and grow, and this field incorporates these qualities and more to create a field full of passion for students, educators, and families. School psychologists are people-oriented, compassionate, empathetic, resourceful, and agents of change, which is exactly what I aspire to be every day,” Bebech said.

“Alanna is a leader and an integral part of the TCESC School Psychology Department,” said Melanie Shipman, TCESC School Psychology Supervisor. “Alanna has risen to the top because she is positive, collaborative, hardworking and committed to supporting students.”

Bebech has been a school psychologist at TCESC since 2017.

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A Psychologist Weighed In On Matt’s ‘Abusive’ Ways On ‘Love Is Blind’ And She Has Some Notes http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/a-psychologist-weighed-in-on-matts-abusive-ways-on-love-is-blind-and-she-has-some-notes/ Fri, 11 Nov 2022 19:26:36 +0000 http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/a-psychologist-weighed-in-on-matts-abusive-ways-on-love-is-blind-and-she-has-some-notes/ The last season of Love is blind had so many red flags that even a clinical psychologist decided to provide expert advice. Isabelle Morley, a clinical psychologist from Massachusetts, says reality TV “should have an ethical duty to protect people,” especially from abusive relationships, which she says is a common theme on LIB3. In a […]]]>

The last season of Love is blind had so many red flags that even a clinical psychologist decided to provide expert advice.

Isabelle Morley, a clinical psychologist from Massachusetts, says reality TV “should have an ethical duty to protect people,” especially from abusive relationships, which she says is a common theme on LIB3.

In a recent column for psychology today, Morley started tearing in the Matt Bolton‘s abusive traits and the Lacheys’ subsequent failure to call him out for it.

She called him “The Matt Mistake” and pointed out how the show seems to have fostered Bolt on the other cast members during the last episode of season 3.

“During the meeting, the Lacheys face the candidates at their most embarrassing, regrettable and painful moments,” Morley pointed out. “Except Matt.”

Instead of making Bolton take responsibility for his actions, the hosts glossed over his multiple outbursts, unlike Bartise Bowden and Cole Barnett, who are forced to explain themselves.

“Nobody is forcing Matt to think or apologize,” Morley added.

Morley also pointed out that none of the other female cast members stepped up to defend his wife Coleen Reed like they did to Zanab Jaffrey at the reunion.

Instead of reprimanding Matt, they went after Reed and made him take responsibility for the loving interaction with Barnett during the pool scene in malibu.

“His behavior was alarming and abusive,” Morley said.

Morley went on to point out Reed’s concerning body language during the reunion episode, including heavy breathing and shifty eyes.

“She barely smiles. She stumbles over the words as she tries to explain herself. She even apologizes for getting emotional and crying,” Morley pointed out. “If she showed up like this in my office, I would be very worried about her.”

Morley called out the show for handling the whole situation in a very unprofessional and possibly dangerous manner.

“If Matt is as abusive as he appeared on screen, then the Lacheys and the entire production team have made an unforgivable mistake,” Morley says.

“They put Colleen in the crosshairs for more abuse. They reopened Matt’s first abuse trigger and encouraged the contestants to rehash their reactions.”

The pair were one of two couples to say yes on season 3 of the hit reality show, despite several tense moments.

Bolton and Reed revealed they weren’t living together because of their leases.

“We’re totally on the same page,” Reed finally clarified, adding that “logistics” and “money” were factors holding them back from moving in.

But some fans didn’t buy it and flooded Reed’s TikTok comments sectionasking to be careful of Bolton, who blasted him several times on camera for seemingly minor arguments on the show.

“His shifty eyes and fake smiles were so creepy this whole reunion episode,” read one popular tweet.

“It’s hard to see abuse when it’s happening to you, and it’s hard to get out of an abusive situation even when you see it. It’s even harder to get out of an abusive relationship when there’s pressure to staying, like being filmed or being put on your wedding day,” explained psychologist Morley from an expert perspective.

She finally offered the show a four-step action plan to Love is blind makers to avoid similar situations in future seasons:

  1. The show should hire a psychologist (or maybe a few) to support contestants
  2. Producers must intervene in the event of abuse. They must protect the well-being of candidates
  3. They should publicize the domestic violence hotline number or other resources
  4. There should be an on-screen message during an abusive interaction so viewers know the behavior is unacceptable and know not to normalize it.

Do you think Love is blind should adopt Morley’s four-step action plan?

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Psychologist Reveals How Sharing Food Can Boost Happiness http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/psychologist-reveals-how-sharing-food-can-boost-happiness/ Wed, 09 Nov 2022 07:46:53 +0000 http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/psychologist-reveals-how-sharing-food-can-boost-happiness/ November 09, 2022 . Fans of the iconic American television series Friends may be familiar with the catchphrase “Joey doesn’t share food!” “. Joey didn’t know that sharing food had its benefits. According to Dr. Gary Chapman, sharing and sending food correlates with two types of love language. In Dr. Chapman’s book The 5 Love […]]]>

November 09, 2022

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Fans of the iconic American television series Friends may be familiar with the catchphrase “Joey doesn’t share food!” “. Joey didn’t know that sharing food had its benefits.

According to Dr. Gary Chapman, sharing and sending food correlates with two types of love language. In Dr. Chapman’s book The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Lasting Love, the two love languages ​​that correlate with food are “receiving gifts” and “acts of service.” The other three types of love language are words of affirmation, quality time, and physical touch.

What makes the correlation between food and love languages ​​appealing and applicable to everyone is that Dr. Chapman has applied love languages ​​to go beyond romantic relationships and extend to family members, friends , colleagues, acquaintances and even at work.

Dr. Chapman is just one of many professionals embracing the virtues of food sharing. In the review article “Food for love: the role of food offer in empathic emotion regulation” by Myrte E. Hamburg et al, food is recognized as a basic human need that affects physiological and emotional states, signifies comfort and is an important indicator for building increased intimacy, friendship and love.

Indonesian mental health educator Agata Paskarista also spoke about the power of sharing food. She says, “Something as simple as sending food to another person can be a form of appreciation, affection and also love, capable of leaving an indelible impression on the recipient. It may seem like such a simple thing to do, but sending someone food at the right time will make them feel very appreciated and cared for.

According to Agata, food sharing has become a new trend and a new culture accelerated by the COVID-19 pandemic.

During the era of social mobility restrictions, many people used online food delivery services such as GoFood to order food for themselves and their families, or to send food to others as a sign. of love or appreciation. Regardless of geographical boundaries, food sharing has increasingly gained popularity as a new language of love.

So how can you enjoy food and the language of love? Here are some tips and tricks to brighten someone’s day by ordering food:

1. Use social media to guide your food order

Today, even grandmothers and grandfathers use social media to share and store memories. When you want to brighten someone’s day by sending them food, find clues on their social media or check out their “GoFood Collection” for foods that make them drool. If you notice they’re craving noodles, head straight to GoFood’s cooking category and find recommendations for customers’ favorite noodle restaurant. Place the order and before you know it, your food gift will be on their doorstep!

2. Celebrate the little things with food

A celebration doesn’t have to be marked by a big occasion like a wedding, engagement, birthday, or other festivities. Small wins in your daily routine can be a great time to show you care. For example, cheering up your friends in the middle of exam preparation with a surprise pizza or a martabak is a very thoughtful gesture. Or maybe you miss a member of your family? Send them comfort food to bring back childhood memories with a taste of the good old days.

3. Share your affection with a note

A short note sent with your food gift can make all the difference. Use the “virtual greeting card” feature on GoFood to show how much you care. Just write your personal message directly from the Gojek app and you can also share it on instant messaging apps. Who would have thought that simply sending food could mean so much!

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Why spending more time with your partner isn’t enough, according to a psychologist http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/why-spending-more-time-with-your-partner-isnt-enough-according-to-a-psychologist/ Sun, 06 Nov 2022 20:00:54 +0000 http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/why-spending-more-time-with-your-partner-isnt-enough-according-to-a-psychologist/ How you spend time with your partner is a great predictor of whether you will work as a couple. Getty Many people come to therapy fearing that they will not be spending enough time with their partner. They ask questions like: “My partner wants us to spend time together every day, but I can’t because […]]]>

Many people come to therapy fearing that they will not be spending enough time with their partner. They ask questions like:

  • “My partner wants us to spend time together every day, but I can’t because of my busy work schedule. How can we overcome this? »
  • “My partner and I spend quite a bit of time together each week, but lately I’ve been feeling a little distant from them. Will spending more time with each other help you? »
  • “My partner loves to go fishing, but I don’t really like it. We don’t have much time for ourselves, so when he asked me to join him, I couldn’t say no. Is it healthy? »

We know how important it is to spend time with our partner. However, it is crucial to understand that there is a distinction between “quantity time” and “quality time”.

Quality time is all about giving your partner undivided attention, whether you’re out for a walk, watching a movie, or just sitting together. It’s an important part of any relationship and it’s necessary to maintain intimacy.

Here are three science-based tips to make the time you spend with your partner really count.

#1. Be present in your hellos and goodbyes

According The Gottman Institute, we should pay more attention to how we greet and part with our significant other. A simple gesture like saying a warm hello or goodbye to your partner allows you to pay attention to them and remind them how important they are in your life. It shows that you are interested in their day and care about them.

Psychologist John Gottman of The Gottman Institute suggests a six-second kiss. Mindful kissing, he says, has several benefits, including reducing stress levels, creating a ritual of connection, and boosting mutual admiration.

#2. Couples who play together stay together

A classic study published in the Journal of social and personal relationships found that the time a couple spends together does not by itself play a central role in sustaining the relationship. However, what you do when you spend time together as a couple reflects the level of satisfaction in a relationship.

Another one study published in the Marriage and Family Diary found that when wives engaged in a leisure activity that only their husbands enjoyed, they reported feeling less satisfied despite the time they spent together. Additionally, wives who were already dissatisfied with their relationship were more likely to agree to a shared leisure activity that they did not particularly enjoy in an attempt to deepen their bond with their husband.

Use your time with your partner wisely and ask yourself why you want to take up a new hobby. Are you both equally invested in pursuing this new interest? If the answer is no, go back to the drawing board and pick something you both will enjoy.

#3. Try to have sex at least once a week

Yes, sex is often a spontaneous activity and planning it can seem like a strange choice. But when the time you have to spend with your partner is limited, it can be a good idea to plan some time between the sheets.

Although not an absolute rule, a study Posted in Social psychology and personality sciences found that couples who had sex at least once a week were more satisfied with their relationship than couples who had less sex.

Physical intimacy is an important aspect of a relationship and has several benefits associated with it. Like kissing, sex lowers stress levels and boosts oxytocin, also known as the love hormone. It can enhance intimacy, maintain the spark, and improve mental and physical health.

Interestingly, the study also showed that couples who had more sex were no happier than couples who had sex once a week. So while sex can be fun and rewarding, you don’t have to lose sleep over it.

Conclusion

Time is a limited resource. So it makes sense to choose quality over quantity, especially when it comes to your intimate relationships. Whatever you do, be sure to make an effort to connect with your partner on a deeper level – it fosters intimacy, keeps the spark going, and helps couples grow together.

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A week of a Yale psychologist in Austria with Ukrainian refugees http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/a-week-of-a-yale-psychologist-in-austria-with-ukrainian-refugees/ Thu, 03 Nov 2022 21:40:29 +0000 http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/a-week-of-a-yale-psychologist-in-austria-with-ukrainian-refugees/ Nathan Schmidt didn’t know what to expect when he called New Haven psychologist Dr. Amit Oren in May. Schmidt and his wife, Dana, had contacted Oren to find out if she was interested in helping organize a wellness retreat in Austria’s central Alps for families who had fled war in Ukraine. In the first months, […]]]>

Nathan Schmidt didn’t know what to expect when he called New Haven psychologist Dr. Amit Oren in May.

Schmidt and his wife, Dana, had contacted Oren to find out if she was interested in helping organize a wellness retreat in Austria’s central Alps for families who had fled war in Ukraine.

In the first months, more than 5 million Ukrainian residents fled to Europe, according to the United Nations. Schmidt had helped families through his nonprofit organization The Mountain Seed Foundation, which he created in 2021 to help people in war-torn countries. The former Marine had decided to spend his life helping the people of Ukraine after serving at the US Embassy in Kyiv from 2015 to 2018, where he was inspired by the bravery of children living in the scarred eastern regions. by Russian-backed aggression.

He wanted to organize a mountaineering trip for these children in the summer, although the plan was originally set for 2023 before the invasion. After completing three combat tours in Iraq, Schmidt found that mountaineering gave him the resilience and a sense of peace needed to combat the trauma of war.

“In my personal journey of suffering from PTSD in conflict zones, the mountains were a way to heal,” he said.

The foundation got Oren’s name from a Ukrainian-American doctor at Yale. Oren is a clinical supervisor for Yale’s Department of Psychiatry and has had a private practice in New Haven for over thirty years helping patients with anxiety, depression and anger. Much to Schmidt’s surprise, she was immediately won over by the idea and was moved by her story.

“He said (on the phone), ‘I served three tours of duty in an unjust war as a Marine,’ Oren said. “He made me wage an ‘unjust war’,” she said.

“Creating Purpose and Meaning”

The idea would come to fruition in the first week of August 2022. Oren and the other 14 team members traveled to the mountainous village of Piesendorf, Austria. They planned the trip in 24 hours.

Oren was in contact with a group of Ukrainian therapists led by one of the country’s leading psychologists, Dr. Viktor Vus, who asked him to host a webinar to teach self-care to Ukrainian therapists.

The foundation’s director of programs, Iryna Prykhodko, used her vast network in Ukraine to bring together 35 mothers and children, all from areas directly affected by the conflict.

For most of the children, their fathers had been killed or were fighting on the front lines or hospitalized in Ukraine with serious injuries. All had escaped from Donetsk, Mariupol, Kharkiv or Bucha.

A woman escaped with her two children from Bucha, seeing dead bodies and burnt-out tanks on the side of the road as she drove out, according to Schmidt. Three boys had a brother fighting in Ukraine and had walked all day to escape the fighting in Mariupol. Another family escaped from Donetsk and lost a loved one in the conflict in March. Another family from Donetsk fled to Bucha for 30 days and witnessed the massacres.

“These kids had seen the conflict first-hand,” Schmidt said.

A residential building damaged by artillery in the rebel town of Pervomaisk in Luhansk Oblast in eastern Ukraine.

Maximilian_Clarke/Getty Images/iStockphoto

Oren remembers the families looking shaken when they got off the bus on the first day. They had their eyes and head lowered and avoided eye contact.

During the trip, with the help of a Ukrainian translator, Oren worked with the mothers and avoided using her traditional approach to PTSD, in which she immersed herself in their traumatic experiences. To begin this healing process in seven days would be like dismissing a patient in the middle of surgery, she said.

“Usually closing the surgical area takes longer than opening it. And you’re not going to see people jump off the table and run away with an open wound,” she said.

His program revolved around the components of PERMA+, a conceptualization of how to achieve a healthy sense of well-being, fulfillment and satisfaction in one’s life. These elements include the appreciation of beauty and connecting with another person, Oren said.

She took individual walks with the mothers around the scenic mountains and talked. Much to his fascination, they all wanted to discuss parenting, especially how to set boundaries and avoid controlling their preteen children.

They asked, “When do you stop focusing only on protection, and why? And when do you let go and let the kids try things out for themselves? When do you love a lot? And when do you start setting limits?” she said. “The same questions that all mothers ask themselves.”

In the morning, she would ask them to name their intention for the day and what they would like to accomplish. She also held workshops on how to live with long-term uncertainty and accept the current situation rather than wishing for something else. She would ask them to list their strengths and they would use it to navigate the journey ahead.

The aim was to bring children and mothers in tune with their emotions, which they are not used to.

“The Ukrainian approach to life, it seems, is that you resist. We can see it in the way they fight. But they are very reluctant to express their emotions, especially towards others towards foreigners “, she said.

Use a method created by Holocaust survivor Viktor FranklOren taught them to develop a sense of purpose from the horrors they witnessed.

“When you go through this kind of warfare, it’s easy to completely lose the sense of meaning,” Oren said. “These women, one of the things that I tried to foster for them, especially the ones that had some survivor guilt, was telling them, ‘Take that energy and help others make your point. Do something with a gift you received here, create purpose and meaning that will get you through it.'”

“I am your future”

While Oren had never known life as a Ukrainian refugee, her ancestors did 100 years ago.

In 1903, Oren’s maternal great-great-grandmother left Kyiv alone with her eight children and settled a mile from the Jordanian border in a small village in Israel, when he was not there were only 12 Jewish families, she said. The city was called Kfar Saba, and it is the city where Oren was born and raised.

Finally, 30 years later, after Hitler’s election in 1933, his father’s mother left Germany alone with her two sons. Oren’s father and brother fled to Israel, where his parents met.

On the first day of the retreat, Oren told this story to the mothers. She also told them about the life her resilient ancestors had made for themselves and for Oren, their great-great-granddaughter.

Oren went on to earn his Ph.D. in clinical psychology and built a career as a forensic psychologist, working in correctional facilities around the world before settling in New Haven.

“I am your future and I am the future of your children,” she told mothers. “I’m a clinical professor at Yale, I have children. I have love and I love. And I’m here to say this is what awaits you,” she told them.

“I felt like I was a representation of hope, being in my presence,” she said. “Because it’s their future. It’s just that when they go through all of this, it’s hard for them to imagine that it’s their future.”

Oren had always imagined the strangers who had graciously provided his ancestors with food and shelter during their travels.

“I wanted to be that stranger for these women, for these families to pay it forward,” she said.

“They have been transformed”

On the Thursday night of the trip, Schmidt was walking through one of the conference areas and was startled by what he saw through the crack in the door.

The mothers and children, who had only known each other for a few days, painted and smiled. Together they sang Ukrainian anthems of pride and joy.

At that moment, Schmidt turned to his wife. “I served in the army. But it might be the most important thing I’ve ever done in my life.

On the final day, participants presented volunteers with a painted 3-by-3-foot sunflower, the national flower of Ukraine. Each petal contained a thank you note and a painting.

“Everyone basically said, ‘Thank you for giving us a chance to help our children and giving us this opportunity to heal,'” he said.

Oren remembers when the mothers boarded the bus on the last day, having a clearer idea of ​​the road ahead and life after reaching their destination. Saying goodbye, one of them picked her up and twirled her around.

This has never happened to Oren before.

“You can imagine what these people went through, and the kind of heaviness and sadness they came with. And when they left, it was a whole different story. They were transformed,” she said. declared.

“A Silver Lining”

Months later, starting on November 3, the war in Ukraine has forced some 14 million people from their homes, with a UN official calling it ‘the fastest and largest displacement seen in decades’ .

Many families displaced on the August trip stayed in Europe and decided to continue therapy for their children, according to Schmidt.
He eventually wants to create a year-round program to help returned war fathers and children from other countries.

Although Oren doesn’t know how many mothers are pursuing therapy, they have all remained more open to research in the future.

“For many people, after the traumatic experience there is a kind of silver lining; there’s something they’ve gained from having suffered, whether it’s a better sense of who they are, or a better sense of what’s important in life, or a greater appreciation for what they have had before anything. We saw it in action with these women and children,” she said.

Oren saw the notes the women wrote the last night of the trip.

On the last night of the trip, all participants rode a gondola to a restaurant at the highest peak of 11,000 feet. Oren took the mothers to a separate room and asked them how they had risen and changed.

Here is what they wrote:

“I want to start a business.”

“I want to teach others what I have learned here and maybe
start something in the community where I’m going.

“I want to live – not just survive.”

“I came here feeling lost, empty and exhausted. And now I feel full.
And I want to move forward. »

“The support I’ve received here has given me renewed faith in humanity.”

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Work on mental health support http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/work-on-mental-health-support/ Tue, 01 Nov 2022 14:00:54 +0000 http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/work-on-mental-health-support/ Properly addressing and respecting employee mental health can help companies thrive while benefiting their people. That was the powerful message from a clinical psychologist who spoke at the 2022 Gases and Welding Distributors Association (GAWDA) annual convention in San Diego last month. Michaela Bucchianeri works as a mental health researcher and educator. She began her […]]]>

Properly addressing and respecting employee mental health can help companies thrive while benefiting their people. That was the powerful message from a clinical psychologist who spoke at the 2022 Gases and Welding Distributors Association (GAWDA) annual convention in San Diego last month.

Michaela Bucchianeri works as a mental health researcher and educator. She began her presentation in front of a crowded conference room by explaining how many people today suffer from mental health problems in the United States. One in five Americans has a mental health problem at some point, and nearly one in two has a diagnosable disorder at some point in their life.

“And that number doesn’t even take into account mental health issues that arise below the level of a diagnosable disorder or in the context of a medical condition, such as chronic pain.” That’s a gross understatement, and that’s still a lot of us,” Bucchianeri said.

With staff mental health impacting every company, the good news, Bucchianeri said, is that it’s entirely possible to cultivate a work culture that makes it easy for all of us to foster better mental health.

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What is psychotherapy and how does it work http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/what-is-psychotherapy-and-how-does-it-work/ Sat, 29 Oct 2022 13:43:09 +0000 http://www.populerpsikoloji.com/what-is-psychotherapy-and-how-does-it-work/ The type of path and approach indicated and used by professionals are different and depend on the type of question, the type of distressand the purpose of the person asking for help. Child and adolescent psychologist The developmental psychologist deals with children and young people up to the age of 18. It assesses and treats […]]]>

The type of path and approach indicated and used by professionals are different and depend on the type of question, the type of distressand the purpose of the person asking for help.

Child and adolescent psychologist

The developmental psychologist deals with children and young people up to the age of 18.

It assesses and treats emotional and behavioral problems, difficulties encountered in relationships with peers and the school environment.

According to his training, he carries out assessments to identify and treat specific learning disorders; he can accompany and intervene in particularly stressful and/or traumatic situations, adopting specific strategies that facilitate the re-elaboration of events.

It also carries out important and fundamental work with families, which are almost always involved because they represent the first and main context of children’s lives and because it is precisely the parents who are their children’s first “therapists”.

Psychotherapeutic journey: when does a teenager need to consult a psychologist?

Adolescence is a very delicate period for many boys and girls, who sometimes manifest suffering which had not occurred before for many reasons or which, although it existed, had not received attention and /or particular concern.

Talking to a psychologist can be a great help in cases where the teenager has been suffering for a long time, or perhaps feels the need to talk about what is making them feel uncomfortable.

In general, adolescents can experience bouts of impulsiveness, anxiety, risky acts and behaviors, but also ask important questions and go through difficult times in search of answers about their identity and their future.

How to Tell Parents You Want to See a Psychologist

What you can do is explain to them that you feel the need to confront an experienced person outside the family about yourself and your relationship with your world, your friends, your classmates and your teachers, but also with your emotions and the way you react to what is happening.

It is very useful to make this request in a quiet moment.

Of course, the reaction can change depending on the relationship you have with your parents and the parents themselves: sometimes the latter fear being judged or held responsible for the emotional suffering of their children.

Psychological examination for the elderly

For the elderly, the figure of the psychologist can be extremely important, because this phase of life is often marked by great changes: interruption of work, new births, illnesses and bereavements that affect those close to them.

These are moments that can bring stress and emotional destabilization, and even have an impact on the balances that until then guaranteed a certain form of life.

The psychologist experienced with the elderly can also provide support to family members of the person with dementia or cognitive impairment.

When should a couple consider psychotherapy?

A couple should consult a psychologist when there is an unresolved discomfort that may be on the side of one or both partners.

Usually the causes of discomfort within the couple relate to life changes due to both external and internal events.

The external events affecting the balance of the couple can be the birth of a child, an illness, the loss of a job; the causes linked to factors defined as “internal” refer to beliefs, values ​​and habits of life learned in the family context to which they belonged, and re-proposed to the new nucleus without having shared them and “re-elaborated” them together as a new couple and a new family.

The objective of couples therapy is to provide a space for listening, reflection and re-elaboration which aims to accompany towards a resolution.

With the help of a professional, new balances and new ways of approaching the problems within the couple can be sought.

It is important to emphasize that embarking on a journey as a couple does not necessarily mean finding a solution that involves continuing to be together.

For someone, that might mean deciding on a separation after acknowledging the value of time spent together and the importance of each continuing on their own path in another way.

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Source:

Humanity

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